10 Ways to Support BAE When Life Gets Hectic
True story: life for a creative can be, and usually is, pretty hectic. Many of us are usually juggling multiple projects at once (including me) - and while all of the work that we put in might feel like "play" because we get to do what we love, the hard part is often having to sacrifice time from those we love, especially BAE.
Most healthy relationships can withstand a season of busyness, whereby one or both individuals are completely consumed during a stretch of time in an attempt to meet a particular goal. But there is also a way of living that feels like you're always busy and like there are not enough hours in a day. A lifestyle like that can put a strain on any relationship. However, consistent, little things usually add up to making a big impact. Below are a few ways that you can offer your partner support and stay connected.
1. Send love notes or text messages.
Your note doesn't have to be a 4-page letter. If you and your boo are into that, then by all means, grab a pen and write out all the feels! But in general, a simple text that says, "I love you," "I miss you," or "thinking of you" is a way to connect directly to the heart, make each other feel good, and build the anticipation of seeing each other later.
2. Send lunch or dinner to the "office".
My husband's office is in an area that doesn't have many healthy meal options. So, when I make our boys' lunches, I tend to make his too. But during those times when lunch isn't made, I will send lunch to his office. Every time I do it, he is completely surprised - and relieved. He doesn't expect me to do it nor has he ever asked me to send lunch to his office. But I just like knowing that he's okay. Try it. It's a small gesture that can go a long way.
3. Offer to take on a task that your partner would usually have to do.
One of the things I love about being in a relationship is having someone who can see the gaps and holes in my life - and help me fill them. If your partner is busy, consider picking up the slack. Can you pick up the laundry, drop off the kids, or fill up the gas tank? I can't tell you how heartbroken I've been in the past when I've jumped in my truck to get somewhere only to realize as I'm getting in the truck that my tank is EMPTY! It's so deflating. But that moment when I've turned the car on and the tank is full because my man filled it up for me is - just - everything. I feel so loved. So trust me, identifying the areas where you can show up for your partner is totally worth it!
4. Let your partner off the hook.
If you're in a healthy relationship with someone who loves and respects you, then it's important to give your beloved a pass when the ball gets dropped - and it probably will. When there are several things to juggle, sometimes the clock and the person's ability don't always line up. If a ball gets dropped, provided it's not life-altering, let it go and fix it. You'll make your partner feel seen and loved - and that always gives a man or woman all the feels.
5. If you have kids, take them out and let bae have the night or morning off.
Those of you with kids know that a break from the chaos is a great gift. So if you find that your boo needs some time to pull things together, find a cool activity for you and the kids and spend the day away from home to give your beloved some time to get their life all the way together.
6. Be okay with just being there.
Sometimes it's not deep - putting it plainly you just want to be near the person you love. When my husband or I are on the couch wrapping up work from the day, we can't really talk too much because we need to focus. But the proximity definitely adds to the morale and every once in awhile, we'll sneak in a short conversation or quickly rock out together when a song we love pops up on the playlist. It works for us because we still feel close to each other even though we're not staring deep into each other's eyes.
7. Workout or play a sport together.
Whatever ways that you and your partner like to decompress could be another way for you two to spend a little extra time together. It's a great time to talk and catch up on what's going on with each other while you're working out. Not to mention, the endorphins add an extra level of spice to the situation as well. Seeing sexy bae glistening with sweat while you encourage one more chest press has a way of intensifying your connection. Just saying...gotta love those endorphins. :D
8. Celebrate the small wins along the way.
Building a solid career is a marathon, so celebrate the small wins. It really doesn't matter how big or small the victory is - it counts. And the mere fact that you see that - and made it a priority to celebrate that makes YOU a keeper while making your partner feel loved and supported.
9. Encourage him/her on the steps they've taken to achieve their desired goal.
No matter how well things are going, sometimes the hustle can be grueling. As a result, it's important to constantly encourage your partner about the steps they're taking to achieve their goal. Share your pride, bring flowers, cook their favorite meal - and encourage bae to keep going.
10. Don't nag or guilt your beloved about their limited time.
If your beloved is a busy person, and you love, respect and trust him/her, then let it be so and don't try to make the person feel guilty about the time they don't have to give to you. I'm not saying you shouldn't vocalize your needs. But there's a way to do that without nagging them or making them feel guilty about the way they're using their time. Be confident in your relationship and the love that your boo has for you. That always goes so much further.
Now this list doesn't suggest that you're not busy too or couldn't use the same level of support. If so, share the list with your boo and discuss ways that you can support each other as you build your careers. You could also choose to stay completely silent about it. If you do so, it's likely that your kindness will incite a lot of reciprocity and keep you both on the path of sharing the love as you build the life you want - together.
Let me know in the comments which idea you're going to do TODAY to show your support. I can't wait to hear about the ways that your relationship is growing.
Cheers to love!